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TV

Christmas TV schedule 2022 UK: I Hate Suzie, His Dark Materials and Happy Valley return for the holidays

By Euan Franklin on 2/12/2022

We’re coldly approaching the end of 2022: another year of darkness, confusion and absurdity in the UK and across the globe. Offering some comfort, at least, is the vast selection of Christmas TV to distract you from the awfulness inside British politics, the cost-of-living crisis, and Russia’s horrific war in Ukraine. Though despite some excellent escapist treats from broadcasters and streaming platforms, there are also many gritty treasures if you’d rather have more of the real world.


From Billie Piper returning as Suzie Pickles in I Hate Suzie Too to Sarah Lancashire concluding her time on BBC's Happy Valley, here's our Christmas TV 2022 guide

Your Christmas or Mine?, Prime Video

Your Christmas or Mine?, Amazon Prime Video

It’s strange to see the baby-faced Asa Butterfield playing an actual adult, considering his time on Sex Education and his many years as a child actor. (Yes, all right, he is 25 in real life, but still.) Shifting from Netflix to Amazon Prime Video, Butterfield stars in this feel-good Christmas treat from Trying director Jim O’Hanlon.


James (Butterfield) and Hayley (Cora Kirke) are besotted with each other, and they hate having to separate for the holidays. He's travelling to Kemble in Gloucestershire and she's going to Macclesfield in Cheshire. But in a shared impulsive moment at the station, they both switch trains to each other’s destinations as a surprise. As they meet their partner’s families, big secrets begin to unravel. Also stars Harriet Walter, Daniel Mays, and Mark Heap.


Photo: Havas Group

WHEN
Friday 2 December
WHERE
Amazon Prime Video
Slow Horses season 2, AppleTV+

Slow Horses, season 2, Apple TV+

It's rare for a show to be distributed so quickly: two new seasons in one year?! But Apple TV+ have achieved that feat for two years in a row. Last year, they dropped the final seasons of Dickinson. This year, it’s the first two chapters of Slow Horses – a funny, rough and grey espionage dramedy set in London.


Jackson Lamb (a pungent Gary Oldman) is the misanthropic head of Slough House, an MI5 location used to tuck away the failures and embarrassments of the agency. But given the deep corruption within the system, the ‘slow horses’ (as they’re known) prove to be essential allies. Season two upgrades from wannabe terrorists to Russian sleeper agents, as long-buried secrets from the Cold War resurface. Also stars Kristin Scott Thomas and Jack Lowden.


Photo: Apple

WHEN
Friday 2 December
WHERE
Apple TV+
I Am Ruth, Channel 4

I Am Ruth, Channel 4

Although a female-led anthology series being helmed by a man is ostensibly problematic, I Am is more complex than that. In a rare depth of collaboration, creator Dominic Savage builds and develops the episodes with the leading actresses involved.


This latest installation is a feature-length special starring Kate Winslet (Mare of Easttown), with whom Savage co-conceives the story of a strained mother-daughter relationship. Winslet plays said mother Ruth, who grows increasingly concerned by her daughter Freya (Winslet's real-life daughter Mia Threapleton) as she succumbs to the mental pressures of social media.


Photo: Channel 4

WHEN
Thursday 8 December, 9pm
WHERE
Channel 4
A Spy Among Friends, ITVX/1

A Spy Among Friends, ITVX

ITV’s new streaming service ITVX is coming on Thursday 8 December, and a slew of great titles are ready for launch day. These include the Gen-Z comedy-drama Tell Me Everything, the racial period drama The Confessions of Frannie Langton (set in Georgian London), and the feature-length finale of Roman sitcom Plebs.


But A Spy Among Friends is the most exciting. Damian Lewis and Guy Pearce star in this John le Carré-like spy thriller, based on the true story of friends Nicholas Elliott and Kim Philby. The latter became known as one of the most notorious Soviet double agents in history, uncovered during the Cold War. The six-part series shows their friendship and the dark duplicity tangling within it.

WHEN
Thursday 8 December
WHERE
ITVX
Guillermo del Toro's Pinocchio, Netflix

Guillermo del Toro's Pinocchio, Netflix

2022 is the year of Pinocchio rivalry between streaming services. Robert Zemeckis’ remake of the Disney classic premiered on Disney+ last September, starring the loveable Tom Hanks as Geppetto. Naturally, Guillermo del Toro’s stop-motion Netflix adaptation adopts a darker tone.


Del Toro and co-writer Patrick McHale (Adventure Time) set the story in Mussolini’s Italy, where Gepetto (David Bradley) carves a wooden puppet child from the tree under which his dead son is buried. Pinocchio (Gregory Mann) is animated to life by Tilda Swinton (playing the sister of Death), and he's pushed into a journey of many moralistic adventures with Sebastian J Cricket (Ewan McGregor).


Photo: Netflix

WHEN
Friday 9 December
WHERE
Netflix
Strike: Troubled Blood, BBC One

Strike: Troubled Blood, BBC One

The problem with television’s influx of true-crime obsessions is that silly indulgences don’t often feature. Thank goodness, then, that shows like Strike still exist. Based on the JK Rowling novels, Tom Edge's series adaptation is now in its fifth adventure with private investigator Cormoran Strike (Tom Burke) and his assistant Robin Ellacott (Holliday Grainger).


Like Holmes and Watson venturing to the West Country in The Hound of the Baskervilles, Cormoran and Robin venture to Cornwall for a new case. Cormoran is approached by Anna Phipps (Sophie Ward) to investigate her mother's disappearance in 1974, which becomes the team’s first cold case. Meanwhile, Robin is enduring a messy divorce as well as unwanted male attention. But will Troubled Blood finally see her and Cormoran get together?


Read our review of Lethal White.


Photo: BBC

WHEN
Sunday 11 December, 9pm
WHERE
BBC One
Litvinenko, ITVX

Litvinenko, ITVX

Prior to the 2018 novichok poisonings in Salisbury, the former Russian FSB detective Alexander Litvinenko was murdered by polonium in London in 2006. As an outspoken critic of the Kremlin, Litvinenko became a target. It was only recently, in September 2021, that Russia was declared responsible by the European Court of Human Rights. A UK murder inquiry conducted in 2016 also claimed that Vladimir Putin ‘probably’ approved the murder – straining UK-Russian ties.


David Tennant plays Litvinenko in this new four-part series from Lupin writer George Kay, which tracks the progress of that latter inquiry. Best known for Doctor Who, Tennant is always keen to show off his eclectic prowess. This role places him in a character that’s vulnerable in body but strong in knowledge. As well as being a fiercely relevant drama, it’ll likely be another zenith performance from one of our finest TV actors.


Photo: ITV

WHEN
Thursday 15 December
WHERE
ITVX
Bardo, Netflix

Bardo, Netflix

For Bardo, Alejandro G Iñárritu (The Revenant, Birdman) channels Federico Fellini’s 8½ – another vivid, somnambulant stride through the mind of a film director. The Mexican-born ‘docufiction’ filmmaker Silverio (Daniel Giménez Cacho) struggles with his identity and his native country’s history, channelling those complicated feelings into his latest project.


You’re treated to unforgettable images of a baby returned to its mother's womb, a pyramid constructed from human bodies, and a long shadow flying through the desert. But more accessible human emotions peek through as Silverio discusses his sense of self, fractured between the US and Mexico, and his growing fear of death.


Photo: Netflix

WHEN
Friday 16 December
WHERE
Netflix
His Dark Materials series 3, BBC One / iPlayer

His Dark Materials series 3, BBC One / iPlayer

It’s been two years since audiences left the alternate universes of His Dark Materials before reluctantly returning to their own. This spectacular adaptation of Philip Pullman’s fantasy trilogy traverses impossible worlds, under threat by the theocratic Magisterium. The third and final series rages war against the Kingdom of Heaven to finally bring down The Authority and create freedom across dimensions. What could be more Christmassy than battling God?


Lord Asriel (James McAvoy) is leading the charge, while his daughter Lyra (Dafne Keen) fends for herself after being kidnapped by the vicious Mrs Coulter (Ruth Wilson). And somewhere along the line, Lyra and her subtle knife-wielding companion Will (Amir Wilson) cross into the land of the dead. You can already tell: it’s going to be an epic conclusion.


Photo: BBC

WHEN
Sunday 18 December, 7pm
WHERE
BBC One / iPlayer
I Hate Suzie Too, Sky Atlantic

I Hate Suzie Too, Sky Atlantic

It’s hard to think of another show that captures the horrors and anxieties of female celebrity life like I Hate Suzie does. This creative collaboration between Billie Piper and Succession writer Lucy Prebble grew into a lockdown hit in 2020, examining the traumatic fallout of former child star Suzie Pickles (Piper) after sexual images of her are leaked online.


In I Hate Suzie Too, she enters an even darker place: reality TV. Losing everyone close to her, Suzie joins a Saturday night dancing competition to reconnect with the public. While prepping for 'Dance Crazee', she continues to fight with her bilious ex-husband Cob (Daniel Ings) and seeks stability in her new life as a single mum. Maybe Dance Crazee will provide the love she needs. Leila Farzad also returns as Suzie’s devoted best friend Naomi.


Read our review of I Hate Suzie.


Photo: Sky

WHEN
Tuesday 20 December / Wednesday 21 December / Thursday 22 December, 9pm
WHERE
Sky Atlantic
Emily in Paris season 2, Netflix

Emily in Paris season 3, Netflix

New season, new style. That’s right: the Instagrammable American in Paris is back, with a brand-new fringe. A year has passed since Emily (Lily Collins) dropped into the French capital to zhuzh up the marketing firm Savoir, and she’s had a lavish, surreal time of it – helping campaigns that range from leeks to Dior. She also tangles herself up in complicated romances, splitting fans between Team Gabriel (the cute, culinary neighbour) and Team Alfie (the hunky, straight-talking Londoner).


Netflix has said little about the plot for season 3, but has revealed that Emily will face 'a crucial crossroads in every aspect of her life'. Her decisions will affect her future in France, but that doesn’t stop the ludicrous, Parisian adventures.


Read our review of season two.


Photo: Netflix

WHEN
Wednesday 21 December
WHERE
Netflix
Vardy v Rooney: A Courtroom Drama, Channel 4

Vardy v Rooney: A Courtroom Drama, Channel 4

These days, the accelerated turnarounds in TV and movies are incredible. Despite the Wagatha Christie scandal starting in 2019 – when Colleen Rooney accused Rebekah Vardy of selling personal stories (shared via Instagram) to The Sun – much of the public interest ignited earlier this year. Vardy sued Rooney for libel, and they faced each other in a High Court defamation trial in May.


Not only has the Wyndham Theatre put on a play based on the trial’s transcripts, but Channel 4 are also airing a new two-part drama about the phenomenon. Starring Michael Sheen as Rooney’s barrister David Sherborne, Vardy v Rooney: A Courtroom Drama examines the court case. The series includes astounding details like witness withdrawals, Whatsapp controversies and meme denials – showing how thrillingly contemporary the story is.


Photo: Channel 4

WHEN
Wednesday 21 December / Thursday 22 December, 9pm
WHERE
Channel 4
The Banshees of Inisherin, Disney+

The Banshees of Inisherin, Disney+

Martin McDonagh is constantly straddling film and theatre, which is perhaps why his movies are so rich in dialogue that's funny, profane and poignant. Following the Oscar-winning Three Billboards outside Ebbing, Missouri, his fourth film The Banshees of Inisherin travels to the west coast of Ireland for a dark tale of a broken friendship.


McDonagh reunites with Brendan Gleeson and Colin Farrell in their first collaboration since In Bruges. Set in a small, rural community, Gleeson and Farrell play lifelong friends Colm and Padraic. When Colm abruptly ends their friendship, Padraic tries hard to mend it. Also stars Barry Keoghan.


Photo: Searchlight Pictures

WHEN
Wednesday 21 December
WHERE
Disney+
Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery, Netflix

Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery, Netflix

Everyone’s favourite Southern detective returns for another case. Rian Johnson’s eclectically enjoyable whodunnit Knives Out was a surprise hit in 2019, spurring Netflix to invest in further mysteries for Daniel Craig’s Benoit Blanc to solve. Glass Onion, Blanc's latest puzzle, takes him to a stupendous mansion on a Greek island owned by the arrogant, Elon Musk-y billionaire Miles Braun (Edward Norton).


A group of wealthy individuals (‘disruptors’) are invited to his island to play a murder-mystery game. There’s a politically incorrect model (Kate Hudson), a men’s rights activist (Dave Bautista), a politician (Kathryn Hayn), and a sour ex-colleague (Janelle Monáe). For some strange reason, Blanc also receives an invitation and the ‘game’ becomes more real.


Photo: Netflix

WHEN
Friday 23 December
WHERE
Netflix
Motherland: Last Christmas, BBC One

Motherland: Last Christmas, BBC One

Yes, it’s nice to revel in the joys and pleasures of this holiday period – but it’s also worth acknowledging the aches and pains too. Motherland was always a comedy that provided a harder, more honest look at parenting, but now these mums face even more complicated challenges within the exhausting context of Christmas.


Julia’s (Anna Maxwell Martin) house is packed this year with plentiful kids and grandparents, as well as Kevin (Paul Ready) offering to make a Persian feast and Liz (Diane Morgan) arriving after her ex-husband fails in his hosting duties. Amanda (Lucy Punch) is hosting her irritating mother (Joanna Lumley) as well as her kids, her ex-husband (Terry Mynott) and his new wife (Louise Delamere). Anne (Philippa Dunne) is actually excited to be hosting her mammy and 29 cousins. And Meg (Tanya Moodie) questions her entire relationship based on her husband’s pitiful present.


Photo: BBC

WHEN
Friday 23 December
WHERE
BBC One
A Ghost Story for Christmas: Count Magnus, BBC Two

A Ghost Story for Christmas: Count Magnus, BBC Two

Continuing a regular tradition, writer and horror fanatic Mark Gatiss (Dracula, Sherlock, The League of Gentleman) returns to tell another ghost story for Christmas. Gatiss dives back into MR James, the literary maestro of scary spectres, to adapt one of the author's best-known works: Count Magnus.


The haunting takes place in 1863. The travelogue writer Mr Wraxhall (James Watkins) investigates a long-dead patriarch of a Swedish family, known as Count Magnus. Retracing Magnus’s history, Wraxhall discovers that the aristocrat hasn't yet departed the land of the living.


Photo: BBC

WHEN
Friday 23 December, 10pm
WHERE
BBC Two
The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse, BBC One

The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse, BBC One

Help and kindness are key aspirations at Christmas, despite the darkness of our times. Author and artist Charlie Mackesy used those virtues for his book The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse, and many have embraced its warmth since its publication in October 2019 – mere months before the pandemic hit.


For Christmas Day, the BBC have prepared a 30-minute animated adaptation, co-directed by Mackesy. Each frame is hand-drawn, reimagined in full colour, following a boy walking through a snowy landscape with a cluster of lovely animal companions. Newcomer Jude Coward Nicoll plays the Boy with Tom Hollander as the Mole, Idris Elba as the Fox, and Gabriel Byrne as the Horse.


Photo: BBC

WHEN
Saturday 24 December, 4:55pm
WHERE
BBC One
Without Sin, ITVX/1

Without Sin, ITVX

Perhaps a drama centred around child murder isn’t a preferred concept for that glorious chillout period between Christmas and New Year. But it’s worth giving Without Sin a chance. After all, the four-part psychological thriller stars the excellent Vicky McClure from Line of Duty and This Is England.


McClure plays the grieving mother Stella Tomlinson, lost and guilt-ridden after her 14-year-old daughter Maisy is murdered – supposedly by Charles Stone (Johnny Harris), who was found standing over her corpse. Stella now works as an Uber driver, dwindling through nights in Nottingham. But then, Charles gets in touch – asking Stella to visit him in prison. She agrees, thinking he’s seeking atonement. The actual reason is much more shocking.


Photo: ITV

WHEN
Wednesday 28 December
WHERE
ITVX
Marie Antoinette, BBC One

Marie Antoinette, BBC Two

Yorgos Lanthimos's period drama The Favourite proved a formative project for its two screenwriters. Tony McNamara (along with co-writing Cruella) went on to create the Emmy-winning The Great, a stylish, revisionist history of Catherine II of Russia starring Elle Fanning. Deborah Davis embodies a similar vibe with her new BBC series Marie Antoinette, covering the famous 18th-century dauphine and later queen to Louis XVI.


A feminist take on her story, the eight-part drama follows Marie Antoinette (Emilia Schüle) as she navigates the repressive French royal court, attempting to change certain attitudes. And from the trailer, the series exudes a party atmosphere as much as a political one. Bridgerton fans, rejoice!


Photo: BBC

WHEN
Thursday 29 December
WHERE
BBC Two
White Noise, Netflix

White Noise, Netflix

Martin Amis once called Don DeLillo's novel White Noise a ‘beautifully tender fever dream’, and that doesn’t immediately call Noah Baumbach (Marriage Story) to mind. Generally, the latter has a Woody Allen-like aesthetic: mutedly examining the emotional lives of creatives and intellectuals. Baumbach's new film adaptation is a trippy, experimental diversion, translating an author whose post-modern body of work is rarely converted to the big screen.


White Noise stars Adam Driver as a professor of ‘Hitler studies’ at a university town, with students and lecturers staring in awe at his command of an audience. He balances those talents with an embarrassing grasp of German, a complex family of kids from previous marriages, and an incoming wave of airborne toxic waste that floods the town. Greta Gerwig and Don Cheadle also star.


Photo: Netflix

WHEN
Friday 30 December
WHERE
Netflix
Happy Valley series 3, BBC One

Happy Valley series 3, BBC One

Similar to ITVX and Without Sin, the BBC are also determined to provide a gloomy start to the new year. If you want grit, misery and murder after nursing a potential hangover from the night before, Happy Valley is the perfect solution.


Sarah Lancashire returns as the straight-talking Yorkshire sergeant Catherine Cawood for her third and final series, kicking off with a body in a reservoir. The corpse is the result of a gangland murder, and it points to Catherine’s incarcerated nemesis Tommy Lee Royce (James Norton). Meanwhile in the family, Catherine’s grandson Ryan (Rhys Connah) is now 16 and wants to build a relationship with a man claiming to be his father.


Photo: BBC

WHEN
Sunday 1 January 2023, 9pm
WHERE
BBC One
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